October 03, 2005
Work Life Balance: Working Mothers Need Not Apply
Gary is a VP at a large financial services company. He has a reputation for being precise and insisting things run like clockwork. Sometimes he takes this to an extreme by yelling at his staff if they are 2 or 3 minutes late for a meeting. Recently, Gary’s wife was out of town for two weeks. She left two grade school age boys with him. The Boss becomes Mr. Mom.
Gary was talking about the challenges of getting his sons ready for school to his assistant, Louise, a mother of two children herself. “With my wife out of town, I am going to leave each day at 3:30PM for the next two weeks to get my boys out of school and to their after school activities,” Gary announced to Louise. “I can’t wait for my wife to get back so I don’t have to do this.”
Louise could see that Gary was clearly frustrated with everything that needed to be done to get the boys going in the morning and to the right place at the right time in the afternoon. Add to this the challenge of keeping up with his meeting schedule and Gary was not a happy VP.
Louise was more amused by Gary’s frustration than sympathetic to him because he was the person, after all, who yelled at her when she was a few minutes late to work one day when she was dropping her kids off at school. At some level she was also furious that Gary was able to simply announce that he was cutting his workday short by 90 minutes for two weeks to deal with his family issues because of his position. She was sure no one was yelling at him for not being at work for the full day.
Louise decided to share this information with Pamela who worked for one of Gary’s peers. Pamela was also furious that it was so easy for Gary to adjust his schedule for child care concerns when Pamela, who was one level below Gary, was not allowed to come to work 30 minutes late and leave 30 minutes early for her own child care considerations in return for not taking a lunch break, because her boss insisted that she be in the office from 8-5 to serve as role model for others. She wondered, somewhat cynically, why it was so important for her to act as a “role model” at the expense of being with her family when it was clearly not important in this case for one of the senior managers to do so.
As Louise and Pamela talked about the situation, they wondered aloud how much of this freedom Gary had was due to his position in the business. Was being a VP enough to come and go as you please? Or was his position less of an issue than his gender? Of the twelve person management team in the business, only one was a woman. And as you moved higher in the organization, there were fewer women executives to be found in positions of power.
Not wanting to be paranoid or hyper sensitive on gender issues, Pamela decided to examine the company’s work/life balance policy. After all, being known as one of the best places to work, this company must have addressed this issue. Well if they had a work/life balance policy, it wasn’t documented in the HR handbook or on the intranet. It seems as though the work/life balance “policy” was created on a department by department basis and subject to interpretation by managers as they review the specific circumstances facing their employees. The policy for Gary’s department was that employees are allowed to adjust their working hours to accommodate personal matters three times a year, subject to prior approval by one’s manager. Maybe Gary was able to negotiate that this 10-day adjustment to his schedule only counted as one of the three times he was eligible for, but neither Pamela nor Louise were buying that they would be given such a liberal interpretation of the policy for their family considerations.
Not surprisingly, the lack of a clear and fairly applied policy has led to a climate problem in the company, particularly with women employees with small children. They see more flexible work arrangements being negotiated in different departments and at different levels. In some cases, they have seen work schedules changed simply because a new manager has been put in place and decided not to honor the previously agreed to work schedules.
The lack trust between employees and management has made women with children afraid to raise this issue. There are very few “role models” for them to talk to that are in positions of power and the HR function is perceived to be ineffective in dealing with these issues. The annual climate survey does not ask specific questions about work/life balance or gender fairness issues and does not provide for meaningful open ended comments.
So while Gary has created a schedule to his liking, Pamela and Louise do their best to manage the balance between family demands and working a full time job. Woody Allen once said that 95% of life is about showing up. Clearly Pamela and Louise have got this covered. Maybe if they were male senior executives, they could master life and show up a little bit less.
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Posted by Greg Robinson at October 3, 2005 03:42 PM
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As an HR Manager, I am constantly struggling with this issue either for or with my employees. With no stated sick day policy, we can't even address the issue of whether or not one could use their own sick time to take care of a sick child, spouse or parent. We too have let this matter be handled on a department by department basis. As a working mother myself, I have felt the need to use vacation time to stay home with my children if they are sick. My boss, although a generally fair person, is aware of the reason for my absences and aware that I'm using vacation time but has never suggested that I don't need to. I am, however, aware that managers in other departments don't require employees to take vacation time for sick kids.
Posted by: at October 14, 2005 09:17 AM
I am not an HR professional but I am a salaried leader who has worked at companies of both persuations--where the need for work/life balance gets differing consideration. Having flexibility built into a schedule more than pays for itself in the long run in the form of loyalty and returned flexibility from the employee when it is needed. When I am with a company who cares about my family and allows me to miss "scheduled work" without making me feel like there is a meter running, I will not think twice about taking work home or putting in extra time on the weekends. If I must use vacation or sick time for every moment that I miss during the "9 to 5" then I am very disinclined to give anything extra.
A company that must deal with all employees via a "black and white" policy is weak and insecure. A company that is well lead (notice that I did not say "managed"--but that is an entirely separate discussion) will get more than they are paying for from their employees and they will be confident in the fact that they can identify and deal effectively with the few people who are inclide to abuse "flex time".
I could go on and on but I think you get where I am coming from...
Posted by: at October 14, 2005 01:31 PM
Work balance is a myth. Of course a VP is going to have much more flexibility than an hourly worker. One is an Exempt employee and one is non-exempt. Exempt worker may be able to flex in some time with the family because they spend so many hours away from their family working longer work weeks. They are under different labor rules. When you open the door to late arrivals for work you shut down everyone from effectively doing their job. The VP is responsible for dept performance so if it suffers because he is gone, he pays the price. There is a difference from being 3 minutes late for work and calling in advance and asking if it is ok to arrive 5 minutes late. Showing up late is not acceptable in any hourly position without a call. I run a small business and if I was nice and considerate about an occassional late, others would just walk on me. I know this. I was that way. It didn't work. Some jobs may allow you to flex in your time but many just don't. A production worker for example must be to work on time or else. In the twelve years of grade school, middle school and high school I never missed a day or was late a day. I know it can be done. No excuses.
Posted by: at January 1, 2007 04:42 PM
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As an HR Manager, I am constantly struggling with this issue either for or with my employees. With no stated sick day policy, we can't even address the issue of whether or not one could use their own sick time to take care of a sick child, spouse or parent. We too have let this matter be handled on a department by department basis. As a working mother myself, I have felt the need to use vacation time to stay home with my children if they are sick. My boss, although a generally fair person, is aware of the reason for my absences and aware that I'm using vacation time but has never suggested that I don't need to. I am, however, aware that managers in other departments don't require employees to take vacation time for sick kids.
I am not an HR professional but I am a salaried leader who has worked at companies of both persuations--where the need for work/life balance gets differing consideration. Having flexibility built into a schedule more than pays for itself in the long run in the form of loyalty and returned flexibility from the employee when it is needed. When I am with a company who cares about my family and allows me to miss "scheduled work" without making me feel like there is a meter running, I will not think twice about taking work home or putting in extra time on the weekends. If I must use vacation or sick time for every moment that I miss during the "9 to 5" then I am very disinclined to give anything extra.
A company that must deal with all employees via a "black and white" policy is weak and insecure. A company that is well lead (notice that I did not say "managed"--but that is an entirely separate discussion) will get more than they are paying for from their employees and they will be confident in the fact that they can identify and deal effectively with the few people who are inclide to abuse "flex time".
I could go on and on but I think you get where I am coming from...
Work balance is a myth. Of course a VP is going to have much more flexibility than an hourly worker. One is an Exempt employee and one is non-exempt. Exempt worker may be able to flex in some time with the family because they spend so many hours away from their family working longer work weeks. They are under different labor rules. When you open the door to late arrivals for work you shut down everyone from effectively doing their job. The VP is responsible for dept performance so if it suffers because he is gone, he pays the price. There is a difference from being 3 minutes late for work and calling in advance and asking if it is ok to arrive 5 minutes late. Showing up late is not acceptable in any hourly position without a call. I run a small business and if I was nice and considerate about an occassional late, others would just walk on me. I know this. I was that way. It didn't work. Some jobs may allow you to flex in your time but many just don't. A production worker for example must be to work on time or else. In the twelve years of grade school, middle school and high school I never missed a day or was late a day. I know it can be done. No excuses.
